Larry Trask / Friday, Aug. 10, 2012 @ 11:39 a.m. /
Ambiguous "tensions" in the Middle East are routinely cited as influencing retail gasoline prices. If that weren't enough, thanks to stupid hippies and their "global warming," there's a monster drought in the flyover states pushing corn prices through the roof. Since there's corn in gas, we pay for it at the pump. And NOW the Chevron refinery in Richmond is shut completely because of a big ass fire.
Gas prices are already more than twenty cents higher per gallon than they were only one week ago and, like the happy couple in the Carpenter's song, they've only just begun (to rise). This is gonna suck and it's gonna suck hard.
But KHUM wants to help you out. We want to help you out, more specifically, by buying you a tank of gasoline. Here are the detials:
The price of one gallon of regular unleaded at the Performance Fuel station on 4th Street in Eureka at noon on Friday, August 10, was $4.37 (lopping off the 9/10ths). Accurately predict what the price of a gallon of regular unleaded gas at that very same station will be at 2pm on Friday, August 24 and we'll (maybe) buy you a full tank of gas (up to a maximum of $75).
Enter by sending Larry an email (email@example.com) stating:
1. Your full name;
2. Your telephone number;
3. Your prediction of what the price of a gallon of regular unleaded gas (omitting the 9/10ths bs) will be at the Performance Fuel station identified above at 2pm on Friday, August 24th.
DEADLINE FOR ENTRY IS 11:59 PM, FRIDAY, AUG., 17. If your prediction is 100% correct, we will buy you ONE (1) tank of gasoline for ONE (1) vehicle up to a maximum of $75.00 total. YEP! We'll get your gas. Here is the weasely fine print:
1. If more than one person gets it exactly right, all such entries will be put into a hat or something and we'll randomly draw a winner;
2. You can enter only once per family. If we catch you stuffing the ballot box, we'll 86 your ass;
3. We'll pick the gas station at which we'll buy you your tank of gas;
4. Sorry folks, email entry only. No phone calls, no cards, no letters, just email. If you don't have a computer, how are you reading this now? You can use computers free at the library;
5. Your entry MUST be received no later than 11:59 PM, FRIDAY, AUG., 17. Entries received after the deadline will not be honored;
6. All the usual ineligibility stuff about LCCI staff, family members, significant others, etc., etc., applies here.
So give it your best guess and maybe we'll be buying you a tank of gas.